So that was 2015 – the year I discovered the joys of Turkish Cinema!
The roll of shame for 2015 is as follows. As usual, I’ve listed them beginning with the very worst, but I haven’t spent hours agonising over getting the order exactly right – after all, that might mean watching some of them again!
Special kudos this year to – who else? – Jerry Warren! Two titles in the Top 10 and he grabbed the number 1 spot. It’s probably his last year of glory though, as I only have one more of his films to track down. Also congratulations to René Cardona who also managed two films in the Top 10 – one a family ‘comedy’ and the other a nasty, tasteless horror film. Such versatility must be praised!
01. The Wild Wild World of Batwoman (1966) (d. Jerry Warren)
02. Venus Flytrap (1970) (d. Norman Thomson – probably)
03. Santa Claus (1959) (d. René Cardona)
04. Mission Mars (1968) (d. Nicholas Webster)
05. Uçan Daireler Istanbulda (Flying Saucers Over Istanbul) (1955) (d. Orhan Erçin)
06. Turkish Star Wars (Dünyayi Kurtaran Adam) (1982) (d. Çetin Inanç)
07. The Fat Spy (1966) (d. Joseph Cates)
08: Night of the Bloody Apes (1969) (d. René Cardona)
09. Face Of The Screaming Werewolf (1964) (d. Jerry Warren)
10. The Woman Eater (Womaneater) (1958) (d. Charles Saunders)
11. Fenomenal and the Treasure of Tutankamen (1968) (d. Ruggero Deodato)
12. Gor (1987) (d. Felix Kiersch)
13. The Devil’s Daughter (1939) (d. Arthur H Leonard)
14. The Norseman (1978) (d. Charles B Pierce)
15. Turkish Superman (Supermen Dönüyor) (1978) (d. Kunt Tulgar)
16. Danger!! Death Ray (1967) (d. Gianfranco Baldanello)
17. The Loch Ness Horror (1981) (d. Larry Buchanan)
18. Turkish Star Trek (Turist Omer Uzay Yolunda) (1973) (d. Hulki Saner)
19. Girl In Gold Boots (1968) (d. Ted V Mikels)
20. The Secret of Treasure Island (1938) (d. Elmer Clifton)
21. Mistress of the Apes (1979) (d. Larry Buchanan)
22. Son of Dracula (1974) (d. Freddie Francis)
23. Time of the Apes (1987) (d. Kiyo Sumi Fukazawa/Atsuo Okunaka)
24. The Yin And The Yang Of Mr. Go (1970) (d. Burgess Meredith)
25. Laserblast (1978) (d. Michael Rae)
26. Jungle Moon Men (1955) (d. Charles S Gould)
27. Goldface, The Fantastic Superman (1967) (d. Bitto Albertini)
28. 2+5 Missione Hydra (1965) (d. Pietro Francisci)
29. Santo y Blue Demon Contra El Doctor Frankenstein (1974) (d. Miguel M Delgado)
30. Casus Kiran / Spy Smasher (1968) (d. Yilmaz Atadniz)
So what have I learnt this year by watching all these bad movies?
You navigate aboard a spaceship using a sextant, if you’re ever on the Planet of the Apes watch out for random UFO attacks, Moon Men wear beach towels, never keep a carnivorous plant in the basement if you’re trying to make a move on a girl who does the hula, Nessie goes for the shoulder, the name of Olaf will live on in the land of the Norse, and what happened to Larry Kent.
…and the 1960s were a terrible time for films. Or should that be a very good time? Hmmm…. That’s all, folks!
See you next year!